20s vs 30s

I sat outside yesterday night with my husband after the kids had all been put to bed. We looked at our house, that will soon be someone else's house, and thought about all the moments and memories we've had here.

Backyard view

As we looked on I thought about how busy and full life with a family has been. How in my early 20s, before motherhood, I had SO much time to do whatever I wanted. So much time at my disposal and even my busy times in life never even came close to the amount I accomplish and do as a mother.

I thought back to before kids and family and who I was back then while I reminisced about who I have become in this place. This home that has been our sanctuary and our growing place these past 6 years!

Life is so much harder now.
Life is so much busier now.
Life is so much more complex now.

Life was fairly simple before kids.
Life was more about me before kids.
Life had a lot more possibilities and openness.

But the reality of those pre-motherhood early 20s: In every bit of purposefulness I was never as on mission as I am as a mom. In every bit of business I was never as productive as I am now. In every bit of possibilities and openness in the world, I would never trade for the daily challenge, sacrifice, and mission of motherhood.

I know I've made a big impact as a wife and a mother, but the impact I've made can't come close to how these people I love more than life, have changed me and I'm SO grateful for it.

So, as I say goodbye to my house, my home. To the place that we've face incredible challenges, deepest heartbreak, and stunning renewal. This home that has watched our babies grow and us along with them. Bringing our son home here and conquering difficulties in our marriage.

Our wedding topper

I will hold each memory dear, but what comes with us is what is the true treasure of this place is; our family grew here. Our family loved here. Our family thrived here. That is the true value, the true gift, the true treasure of home.


Much love,
-Joy