The Day I Have Been Waiting For...
Today is my surgery day.
Of course, I am writing this ahead of time. Actually, a week ahead. I just finished my pre-op conversation with the surgical nurse.
Lots of thoughts are bouncing around in my head. Lots of fears need to be captured and put in their place.
Will my baby be alright being away from me during the surgery? Will he take a bottle? How long will I have to pump and dump? How worried are my other kids? Will this be hard for them?
Will this operation work? Is it worth it, or will I still have chronic pain afterwards? How long will recovery take? How is everything that I do around here going to get done while I’m bedridden and healing?
We mamas like to run things, it's what we do all day long. Kind of hard when we aren’t in control. But are we ever really in control, anyway?
No.
Not really.
Life is always ready to throw us a curveball. Yes, we do our best to be prepared, but we never know when something will happen that will completely change our lives.
When I went to sleep during my last surgery (3.5 years ago) I thought, "This is it, I'm finally going to get some relief." I was wrong. The pain was replaced with a different kind of pain. I guess that is why I am so apprehensive about this surgery. I just don't know what will happen!
Jesus said that worry doesn't add an inch to our height or a minute to our life. Science backs him up on this. The more negative thoughts we have, the more it negatively impacts our health and outlook on life.
I want to ask you mamas to pray for me, please. And I will pray for you as well. Whatever you are going through, I ask that you will have a peace that passes understanding fill your hearts, and minds, and souls.
Much love,
Lee
Of course, I am writing this ahead of time. Actually, a week ahead. I just finished my pre-op conversation with the surgical nurse.
Lots of thoughts are bouncing around in my head. Lots of fears need to be captured and put in their place.
Will my baby be alright being away from me during the surgery? Will he take a bottle? How long will I have to pump and dump? How worried are my other kids? Will this be hard for them?
Will this operation work? Is it worth it, or will I still have chronic pain afterwards? How long will recovery take? How is everything that I do around here going to get done while I’m bedridden and healing?
We mamas like to run things, it's what we do all day long. Kind of hard when we aren’t in control. But are we ever really in control, anyway?
No.
Not really.
Life is always ready to throw us a curveball. Yes, we do our best to be prepared, but we never know when something will happen that will completely change our lives.
When I went to sleep during my last surgery (3.5 years ago) I thought, "This is it, I'm finally going to get some relief." I was wrong. The pain was replaced with a different kind of pain. I guess that is why I am so apprehensive about this surgery. I just don't know what will happen!
Jesus said that worry doesn't add an inch to our height or a minute to our life. Science backs him up on this. The more negative thoughts we have, the more it negatively impacts our health and outlook on life.
I want to ask you mamas to pray for me, please. And I will pray for you as well. Whatever you are going through, I ask that you will have a peace that passes understanding fill your hearts, and minds, and souls.
Much love,
Lee
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