Are You Lonely?
Loneliness and motherhood...
Loneliness in any area of life can be a stunting, oppressive, and painful thing and Motherhood can feel pretty lonely at times.
One month after I got married (in Spring), I quit my job to stay home with the kids. I knew it was exactly where I was supposed to be, it was exactly where I wanted to be, but it still was lonely and hard at times.
That summer, my husband and I thoroughly discussed schooling options (our longest "discussion"/argument to date). We ended up deciding that I would homeschool our girls come Fall.
In Fall we started our homeschooling journey. We joined a co-op that ran like a parent-led private school. It was nice to be around people but the twinge of loneliness still lingered as deep friendships weren't really there. Two years later we left the co-op to homeschool from home (a wonderful decision)! One week into being home with the kids and I was dying of loneliness and going stir crazy. I'M AN EXTROVERT!!!!
So, I had to come up with solution to work with who I am, the season I'm in, and the challenging that come with it. But loneliness was still a real struggle...
Loneliness is a horrible thing.
Loneliness seems to stifle a part of who we are and the joy we feel.
Loneliness is depressing.
So what do you do about it?!?!
I watched this ted talk recently that summed it up so well! We are not meant to be alone! We are designed for daily deep connection. I'll repeat that daily, deep connection. How many of you feel like you deeply connect with other adults on a regular basis? I would say for me that can be pretty challenging!
For me, having a group of godly moms (a moms group) who meet weekly has been a huge joy to me! It's a group where we get to be fully honest and accepted. To be able to connect on that deep level, about real things, sharing struggles and joy openly, caring for one another, and encouraging each other in this particular season satisfies that craving for meaningful connection. That desire for deep connection is a part of how we are made!
Taking the time to be a friend is another huge one!
Loneliness in any area of life can be a stunting, oppressive, and painful thing and Motherhood can feel pretty lonely at times.
One month after I got married (in Spring), I quit my job to stay home with the kids. I knew it was exactly where I was supposed to be, it was exactly where I wanted to be, but it still was lonely and hard at times.
That summer, my husband and I thoroughly discussed schooling options (our longest "discussion"/argument to date). We ended up deciding that I would homeschool our girls come Fall.
In Fall we started our homeschooling journey. We joined a co-op that ran like a parent-led private school. It was nice to be around people but the twinge of loneliness still lingered as deep friendships weren't really there. Two years later we left the co-op to homeschool from home (a wonderful decision)! One week into being home with the kids and I was dying of loneliness and going stir crazy. I'M AN EXTROVERT!!!!
Loneliness seems to stifle a part of who we are and the joy we feel.
Loneliness is depressing.
So what do you do about it?!?!
I watched this ted talk recently that summed it up so well! We are not meant to be alone! We are designed for daily deep connection. I'll repeat that daily, deep connection. How many of you feel like you deeply connect with other adults on a regular basis? I would say for me that can be pretty challenging!
For me, having a group of godly moms (a moms group) who meet weekly has been a huge joy to me! It's a group where we get to be fully honest and accepted. To be able to connect on that deep level, about real things, sharing struggles and joy openly, caring for one another, and encouraging each other in this particular season satisfies that craving for meaningful connection. That desire for deep connection is a part of how we are made!
Taking the time to be a friend is another huge one!
We have a million ways to "connect" with our phones, internet, and social media but, for me, it seems to only have made the loneliness factor greater. We're so preoccupied with busy, or our phone, or our to-dos to take the time to really connect with someone one-on-one, to prioritize that meaningful connection. Go to the park with a friend and talk about what's really go on with you. Join a Mom's Group that you find encouraging and full of authenticity. Find places where you can be real and free to be you, to connect deeply, and let others connect to you. Don't wait for someone to be your friend, make the effort first, be a good friend and see where it goes.
So in your daily Mama, remember you are not alone, it does feel like it some times but you are not alone. There is a great community of Moms out there. Let's be honest and real so others feel free to be themselves too. Be uniquely and bravely you dear Mama and watch what can happen!
-Joy
If you've been encouraged, please share!
If you've been encouraged, please share!
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